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uncle fred
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2001-03-31
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44 lines
It's Saturday morning and John's just about to set off on a
round of golf when he realizes that he forgot to tell his
wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming
around at noon. So John heads back to the clubhouse and phones
home.
"Hello?" says a little girl's voice.
"Hi, honey, it's Daddy," says John. "Is Mommy near the phone?"
"No, Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Fred."
After a brief pause, John says, "But you haven't got an Uncle
Fred, honey!"
"Yes, I do, and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy!"
"Okay, then. Here's what I want you do. Put down the phone,
run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout in to
Mommy and Uncle Fred that my car's just pulled up outside
the house."
"Okay, Daddy!" A few minutes later, the little girl comes
back to the phone. "Well, I did what you said, Daddy."
"And what happened?"
"Well, Mommy jumped out of bed and ran around screaming, then
she tripped over the rug and went out the front window and
now she's all dead."
"Oh, my God! What about Uncle Fred?"
"He jumped out of bed too, and he was all scared, and he
jumped out the back window into the swimming pool. But he
must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to
clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now
he's dead too."
There is a long pause.
"Swimming pool? Is this 555-3097?"